Hello there.
What's up?
Alright, right now, read all these with the best British accent you can fake. Because British accent is SEXY.
Alright. I'm basically writing this because my friend FORCES me to. She's bored and she wants ME to write something to reduce her boredom. So, I thought, boredom. Yeah, boredom inspires the most beautiful creations.
Alright.
Right now I'm going to talk about a perfect life, a perfect world. (well, I hope it'll not make you feel bored)
My idea of being "perfect" is definitely different from society's. Society's idea of being "perfect" is to be good-looking, kind-hearted, nice and have nice curves (for girls) and abs (for boys). This is completely stupid. Biggest load of bullsh*t I've ever heard.
However, just think, good-looking people always give you a good first impression, and average-looking people does not. And, I'm saying this because I'm going to talk about MY definition of being "perfect". To me, being perfect is to have flaws and we'll fix those flaws. And if a person can do it, then that person is perfect.
A perfect LIFE. Well, that's about the same thing, like, look.We're living in an imperfect world where we can't control everything with our mind. However, as I said, being PERFECT is to have flaws, so in this life, we have to work for what we want. And these are all so well-planned, like, we humans have a living rule: we need to drink and there's existence of water. We have animals, and someone created Pokemon to make us imagine animals as those creatures. And Harry Potter! We can't do magic, but we can make it happen using optical illusion.
*Ugh. This is happening again. I'm typing random stuff that pops up my mind and I don't even understand what am I typing. This is happening and I don't like it.*
Alright, what I wanna say is that.we have a perfect life, and we're living in a perfect world, because everything is planned SO WELL before human even exists. This is totally a proof of perfection. And how did humans even exist? There are scientific proof that there's this particle that they called "The God Particle" that created MATTER. However, I just think that all of these are too perfect.
The universe is like a fictional book, everything has to be planned so perfectly and we are the characters in the book. And here's another question: How did the universe exist?
Everything is so confusing. And so is this blog post. I feel so bad for the friend who asks me to write something right now, and so I just bullsh*t out what I thought, and I think they definitely don't make sense.
Friday, September 28, 2012
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Goodbye Sister! :')
Hey there, today's 22/9, one month to RED, but also a sad day for me, since my half-sister, Josephine, is leaving to the UK. Well, maybe I should say, "WAS" cause she's in the plane already. Going to describe my emotions in two paragraphs.
So, I didn't really talk with her today because I don't want to, I know I'll make myself cry. And her friends also talked with her a lot, so I didn't wanna bother them. When she was about to depart, she hugged everyone, and everyone said something to her, as advice, and she started crying. I stood as far away as possible because I didn't want to hug her. I feel so sad that moment, I was crying already, but there were no tears because I was holding them back. Then, she went into the departure and we went home. I cried on the way home, but it was dark, and I was making no sobbing sound, so yeah no one noticed :)
To be honest, I think that the reason I cried is not because she's leaving, it's more than that. She's like my only friend when I was a child. I don't know how to say our real relationship, but just we're not blood-related but we're like half-sister since young. She's LEGIT my only friend since I was born till when I started going to middle school because I was really bad at making friends. So, I cried because I felt like, everyone who were in my childhood are grown-ups now. I felt really, really heartbroken.
We had too many memories together:
1) We went to three concerts together: Wonder Girls, Westlife and Avril Lavigne.
2) Once, we went to a restaurant for lunch and then we talked about something and we laughed so hard we hid under the table and everyone gave us weird stares.
3) We watched Finding Nemo together in the cinema. It's the first time I've ever been to a cinema. There's a scene where nobody is laughing, but she found it really funny and so she became the only one who laughed in the cinema. And then everyone stared at us, and it was really awkward.
4) She taught me ice skating!
5) We used to have a diary where I write to her about stuff I didn't dare to speak out, and she would reply me with how I should face it. That was when my uncle passed away & my dad went for a surgery & my momma got stroke and I had a very, very traumatic time.
And the funniest thing is that she's 7 years older than me, and our birthday are ONE day apart. Mine's on 2nd of November, and hers is on the 3rd of November. And I have a nephew, he's 7 years younger than me, and his birthday is on the 5th of November. (SO CLOSE)
Well, basically, that's it. I just noticed that, everyone around me, who used to be my childhood besties, are all grown-ups now, because I am the youngest one in my family (before my nephew was born). They will all be finding jobs, working, and be busy earning money (maybe). However, I think 2 years later when she's back, I will be having fun with her, as well as my other cousin bros and sis. One of my cousin bros who came back from Oklahoma few months ago, has now found a job and settled down.
Might not be having as much fun as we used to, but the memories will last forever. Love all you sis and bros :)
So, I didn't really talk with her today because I don't want to, I know I'll make myself cry. And her friends also talked with her a lot, so I didn't wanna bother them. When she was about to depart, she hugged everyone, and everyone said something to her, as advice, and she started crying. I stood as far away as possible because I didn't want to hug her. I feel so sad that moment, I was crying already, but there were no tears because I was holding them back. Then, she went into the departure and we went home. I cried on the way home, but it was dark, and I was making no sobbing sound, so yeah no one noticed :)
To be honest, I think that the reason I cried is not because she's leaving, it's more than that. She's like my only friend when I was a child. I don't know how to say our real relationship, but just we're not blood-related but we're like half-sister since young. She's LEGIT my only friend since I was born till when I started going to middle school because I was really bad at making friends. So, I cried because I felt like, everyone who were in my childhood are grown-ups now. I felt really, really heartbroken.
We had too many memories together:
1) We went to three concerts together: Wonder Girls, Westlife and Avril Lavigne.
2) Once, we went to a restaurant for lunch and then we talked about something and we laughed so hard we hid under the table and everyone gave us weird stares.
3) We watched Finding Nemo together in the cinema. It's the first time I've ever been to a cinema. There's a scene where nobody is laughing, but she found it really funny and so she became the only one who laughed in the cinema. And then everyone stared at us, and it was really awkward.
4) She taught me ice skating!
5) We used to have a diary where I write to her about stuff I didn't dare to speak out, and she would reply me with how I should face it. That was when my uncle passed away & my dad went for a surgery & my momma got stroke and I had a very, very traumatic time.
And the funniest thing is that she's 7 years older than me, and our birthday are ONE day apart. Mine's on 2nd of November, and hers is on the 3rd of November. And I have a nephew, he's 7 years younger than me, and his birthday is on the 5th of November. (SO CLOSE)
Well, basically, that's it. I just noticed that, everyone around me, who used to be my childhood besties, are all grown-ups now, because I am the youngest one in my family (before my nephew was born). They will all be finding jobs, working, and be busy earning money (maybe). However, I think 2 years later when she's back, I will be having fun with her, as well as my other cousin bros and sis. One of my cousin bros who came back from Oklahoma few months ago, has now found a job and settled down.
Might not be having as much fun as we used to, but the memories will last forever. Love all you sis and bros :)
Monday, September 17, 2012
Morning!
It's like 9:39AM now, and this is a little weird since it's like, my first post written in the morning- about half an hour after I woke up. And so, I named my post "Morning!"
A new day represents a new plan, a new life. (I feel like such a mature and deep person now. Haha. Just kidding.) Today, erm, actually, I mean, these past few days I've been staying at home since it's weekend + it's Malaysia Day! I went on Twitter as usual, not studying as usual, and I finished reading Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets! (it's so cool, by the way) And I thought, "Why am I so sarcastic and mean to people?" It just kind of hit me.
*Reminder: There might not be a lot of pictures (might not be ANY) in this post, so you gotta run before you get bored! :)
I've told myself a few posts before, that I like who I am right now, having fun, making fun of everything around you, and that I'll stay that way forever, but I think that's about to change. I don't know why, but in some way, I think that I should have fun myself, yes, but I should make others life worth living too, right? So, I just kinda went into deep-thinking the past three days, and I made up my mind-- I'm going to continue being sarcastic, but not as much as I did, and I'm going to be nicer to people. (Taylor helped me 13% in my decision, she's a nice person, and her fans should totally be as nice as she is)
And, to be honest, I kinda think that the song "Ronan" reminds me of who I used to be. It's just weird because that song is about a beautiful boy who died, and it reminds me of my aunt and uncle, of course, but it also changes me in person. It. Is. So. Weird. Well, that's probably why I love music so much. It changes people. And you are what you listen to, so, yeah, listening to music like this really does calm people down, and make us think about ourselves.
So, dear amazing people, who reads my blog, I hope you guys will think of a way to make yourself a better person, and it's not like I'm saying that, being a nicer person will make you a better person. Being a "better" person can mean so many different things. Like, you can make yourself to be a stronger person, to stop people from doing stuff to you; or you can be a happier person, so everything will be positive to you; or you can be a quiet person, so you'll say nothing, and nothing'll happen to you.
And, most of all, this performance melted me, and I just sat down and broke down. It's so sad, and powerful at the same time, and from the moment I watched the performance, I started thinking of the whole "I-should-change-my-way-to-face-life" issue. This is The X Factor USA, a performance by Jillian Jensen (song: "Who You Are" by Jessie J)
Look at her, the girl who made Simon Cowell CRIED. That's like a mission impossible, but it happened anyway. And the look on her face when she finished singing and started crying-- I couldn't hold it any longer.
Well, that's basically the concept of "becoming a better person" and two things made me thought of "changing" (grr it sounds so corny. google searching the synonyms for "changing", hold on...) All right, so I think I should say "adjustment". First, it's the song "Ronan", then the performance of Jillian-- both did some "adjustment" to me so I can live a good life, and making others better too :)
OK. I'm almost done here:
Weird news of the day: I watched some videos on how to write a song, and guess what, I KNOW HOW TO WRITE A SONG NOW. However, I still haven't written any song yet.. Hmm I don't know what to write about, and I have no time. I'll do it soon enough, maybe after exam, or during exam. Who knows? Songwriting seems so interesting, and it might just make me addicted to it :)
PS: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. For you, making my post for "Ronan" to reach 161. I checked yesterday, it was 131 views, now it's 161. THANK YOU SO MUCH. All right, now some beautiful pictures for you, for being so amazing. These pictures will produce eyegasm. Haha if eyegasm is a word :)
A new day represents a new plan, a new life. (I feel like such a mature and deep person now. Haha. Just kidding.) Today, erm, actually, I mean, these past few days I've been staying at home since it's weekend + it's Malaysia Day! I went on Twitter as usual, not studying as usual, and I finished reading Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets! (it's so cool, by the way) And I thought, "Why am I so sarcastic and mean to people?" It just kind of hit me.
*Reminder: There might not be a lot of pictures (might not be ANY) in this post, so you gotta run before you get bored! :)
I've told myself a few posts before, that I like who I am right now, having fun, making fun of everything around you, and that I'll stay that way forever, but I think that's about to change. I don't know why, but in some way, I think that I should have fun myself, yes, but I should make others life worth living too, right? So, I just kinda went into deep-thinking the past three days, and I made up my mind-- I'm going to continue being sarcastic, but not as much as I did, and I'm going to be nicer to people. (Taylor helped me 13% in my decision, she's a nice person, and her fans should totally be as nice as she is)
And, to be honest, I kinda think that the song "Ronan" reminds me of who I used to be. It's just weird because that song is about a beautiful boy who died, and it reminds me of my aunt and uncle, of course, but it also changes me in person. It. Is. So. Weird. Well, that's probably why I love music so much. It changes people. And you are what you listen to, so, yeah, listening to music like this really does calm people down, and make us think about ourselves.
So, dear amazing people, who reads my blog, I hope you guys will think of a way to make yourself a better person, and it's not like I'm saying that, being a nicer person will make you a better person. Being a "better" person can mean so many different things. Like, you can make yourself to be a stronger person, to stop people from doing stuff to you; or you can be a happier person, so everything will be positive to you; or you can be a quiet person, so you'll say nothing, and nothing'll happen to you.
And, most of all, this performance melted me, and I just sat down and broke down. It's so sad, and powerful at the same time, and from the moment I watched the performance, I started thinking of the whole "I-should-change-my-way-to-face-life" issue. This is The X Factor USA, a performance by Jillian Jensen (song: "Who You Are" by Jessie J)
Look at her, the girl who made Simon Cowell CRIED. That's like a mission impossible, but it happened anyway. And the look on her face when she finished singing and started crying-- I couldn't hold it any longer.
Well, that's basically the concept of "becoming a better person" and two things made me thought of "changing" (grr it sounds so corny. google searching the synonyms for "changing", hold on...) All right, so I think I should say "adjustment". First, it's the song "Ronan", then the performance of Jillian-- both did some "adjustment" to me so I can live a good life, and making others better too :)
OK. I'm almost done here:
Weird news of the day: I watched some videos on how to write a song, and guess what, I KNOW HOW TO WRITE A SONG NOW. However, I still haven't written any song yet.. Hmm I don't know what to write about, and I have no time. I'll do it soon enough, maybe after exam, or during exam. Who knows? Songwriting seems so interesting, and it might just make me addicted to it :)
PS: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. For you, making my post for "Ronan" to reach 161. I checked yesterday, it was 131 views, now it's 161. THANK YOU SO MUCH. All right, now some beautiful pictures for you, for being so amazing. These pictures will produce eyegasm. Haha if eyegasm is a word :)
AND FINALLY
 |
| She looks amazing from the back and she's beautiful inside and out :) |
Saturday, September 8, 2012
Ronan Thompson.
 |
| RIP 12.5.2007 TO 9.5.2011 |
He's beautiful. Isn't he? He's a fighter. He fought for 8 months. He never gave up. He never let himself to do so, but the day just has to come. He only got to live for 4 years. It is totally unfair. It is never, ever, ever ok to let a little kid leave without experiencing every stage of life. It's all because of the stupid neuroblastoma.
Well, I don't have much to say this time. Read the blog. Listen to the song below. Click into the link to watch a video of Ronan 1 year ago. You'll know many things. Enjoy.
Some pictures of the lyrics from "Ronan"
Just basically, that's it. All I want is for you to visit Rock Star Ronan's blog and buy the song on iTunes because the money will go for cancer-related charity. Do some good. Buy the song here.
I miss my aunt and uncle and I know some of you out there miss your loved ones who were taken away by this stupid sickness.
TO EVERYONE:
Sunday, September 2, 2012
Cancer.
This post is going to be full of sadness. I wish I could add snows to produce the sad effect. But I can't. I'll just add pictures of snows. And shadows. And darkness... Well, there's still going to be some very "inspiring" stuff in this blog. Like, 14-year-old inspiring. Sooooo inspiring. Just kidding, at this age, we're still playing with our toys. Just kidding, (again) at this age, we get hated by adults.
So, in this post, I'm going to talk about the scary and evil CANCER. (not the horoscope pffft) CANCER is my biggest weakness since two of my favorite people have left me because of it. (My second biggest weakness is watching old people eating alone in restaurant) Kinda heartbreaking.
Before I start, here's some pictures that represent sadness (as I promised):
So, in this post, I'm going to talk about the scary and evil CANCER. (not the horoscope pffft) CANCER is my biggest weakness since two of my favorite people have left me because of it. (My second biggest weakness is watching old people eating alone in restaurant) Kinda heartbreaking.
Before I start, here's some pictures that represent sadness (as I promised):
Well, well, well. I'm writing this because I read an article by a humble, down-to-earth music critic, Brian Mansfield, who just found out that he's diagnosed with cancer. (AND, I'm not writing this to make you feel emo, because I'm not an emo person, and I don't like people being emo. I'm not emo right now, you can see it from the way I talk on my blog though) Here's the link to the article if you're looking for it: http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/story/2012-09-01/semicolon-life-taylor-swift/57449492/1
He has a playlist of songs that make him want to live, and you can find it all in the article. He even included "Give Me Love" by the brilliant Ed Sheeran, which is also one of my favorite songs.
Cancer is the word that haunts me the most, as I said. It's a 50:50 chance to knock out cancer, and the positive 50% requires a lot of energy, money, determination and mostly, your own motif to live. Meanwhile, the other 50% requires absolutely nothing. A lot of people (including my uncle and aunt) chose to fight it. Eventually, cancer knocked them out instead. I don't even know how is that even possible. My uncle fought for about 1-2 years; while my aunt fought for 8 years. EIGHT FREAKING YEARS, I TELL YOU. The first few years were when I was still young, then the following years she went under medication, but in the year 2010, it's back. So, I can easily say that 2010 is my worst year. She fought for the whole year, and left at November 2010, my birth month.
Music. To me, music, is probably the only way to beat cancer. To me. Like, if we don't want to fight cancer in the hard way, that is to undergo treatment, we just gotta let it be, and stay positive, and see how it goes. Music is the medicine for every sickness, anyway. (I know you're probably as confused as Taylor is...)
And, by the way, if you read the article, Taylor Swift (*fairytale music playing in the background*) had a talk with Brian, and made Brian think that her songs about ex-boyfriends are just like his soundtracks to fight. Both of those are lessons in life. And, Taylor is also a girl who can't watch little children, (or adults) fighting with cancer. She hopes to motivate people to "remember somebody they lost, or inspire them to send flowers to somebody they know who's going through it."
I remember once she visited a house full of cancer patients (all-children) and sang a few songs to them, including "Beautiful" by Christina Aguilera, which made a lot of parents go teary. I feel so...('proud' sounds too corny)..erm...PLEASED, to have this girl as my idol :)
Wow. This post took me longer than I should have. And well, add this person called "Brooke's Blossoms N Buddies" they're the group of cancer patients that Taylor sang to last year. They're a bunch of beautiful children, and Blossoms, one of them, has successfully knocked out the stupid cancer in the beginning of year 2012, I think :)
Now, it's time for recommendation:
"Run To Me"
Thank goodness I subscribed KurtHugoSchneider. Now I found out this amazing song and the cool crime web series called "RUNAWAYS" Check it out :)
Monday, August 20, 2012
A Letter To The Future Me.
Hello there! How are you? I hope you're doing fine. I don't know how's the world in 2023. Technologies must have taken over the world, that's for sure. I hope you don't get too fat! I'm sorry but I just couldn't control my appetite. I love food too much I could marry food. So, well, this is a normal letter. Just a normal letter from the 14-year-old you. I'm writing this to you because I know by the age of 25, you are not going to be having as much fun as I do right now. It's really fun to be young and free. No worries about house rents, taxes and family. If you're feeling as free as me, then congratulations, your life is amazing; but if you're feeling really stressed out, then you'll have to read this letter, and smile, because your life was really amazing, and the magic will continue after you finish reading this.
Well, you were a movie lover, and the Toy Story trilogy was your favourite movie. Are you still obsessed with Toy Story? I mean, you adored that movie so much, you watch them once a week when you were around 7. You like to quote from the movie too! Woody is your favourite animated character, do you remember? He was a leader of the toys, and you adored him for his amazing leadership. And, don't forget, you also enjoyed the epic quote from Buzz Lightyear, "To infinity and beyond!"
By the way, have you started travelling? I've been living for 14 years and I haven't been to any foreign countries. And, talking about travelling, I think you still remember that your dream city is Nashville. Haha. Well, Nashville is not exactly a city, but well, you liked Nashville for the peaceful feeling it gives and the heart-warming people living in around there. Of course, you also want to visit Paris, the romantic city and London. I don't remember why, but you seem to like the Great Britain a lot!
You also loved music. I hope you still do. Music has changed your life. Remember? Before you got into music, you were just a nerd, who always gets #1 in class. After that, your studying slacked, but because of music, your life has become so beautiful and you changed a lot since then. You don't have a favourite song, nor a favourite musician, but you loved Taylor Swift to death. You liked her for not just her songs, but also her. You liked indie music, for example, Joe Brooks. Ed Sheeran used to be an indie artist, but you liked his musical style a lot too. You also loved Adam Young, not just for Owl City, but also for Sky Sailing, Port Blue and Ambient Blue. You liked acoustic songs a lot, and folk songs too. I hope you haven't started listening to K-Pop. You were the only person in school that did not like K-Pop.
You like to take photos and post them on Instagram. Even though you realize that it's annoying to post photos every day, you just couldn't resist. You were really into photography and cinematography. Basically, you take photos every day, often using your iPhone instead of your DSLR. You only use DSLR when you weren't with your friends because you know that they will break your DSLR into pieces. You really like to take pictures of your friends when they weren't paying attention and you also like to take pictures of weird stuff and also beautiful sceneries. I hope you still do.
Now, let's talk about who you were. You were the total opposite of how a normal teenage girl behaves. They wear short skirts, you wear t-shirts. (okay, fine I admit it, I copied this line from Taylor's song) They fall in love with boys, you fall in love with food. They talk about love, you talk about fictional characters. There'll be laughter if you were there. You liked sarcasm a lot too. You think a lot. About life and about music and about food and about books... But you never talked about them in front of your friends. You write them down, either by tweeting them or by blogging them. Oh, talking about friends, you have a whole bunch of friends, but you don't have any friends that are best for you, A.K.A best friend. You find it very girl-y and...just yucky. You don't have a dream job, but you have a dream: You wanted to go to Nashville, Paris and London and to meet Taylor Swift.
You were a very happy-go-lucky person. You didn't care about what people think about you. You didn't mind if you were alone. I'm not sure how are you in 2023, but I hope you hadn't changed much. I'll always read this letter and remind myself not to change too much until people couldn't recognize me. Anything could happen in 10 years. In the past 14 years, many things have happened: Two of my favourite person passed away; I got first place in a national competition. (my greatest achievement so far); and finally, I learnt that life is amazing and if possible, I will spend most of my time doing stuff that I like.
You may or may not remain the person you used to be, but I hope you wouldn't change too much. I realized that these two years have been the best of my life so far. You changed a lot since birth, of course you did. And you've finally found out the way you want to live your life, and that is to enjoy. If you were busy finding a job right now, or you've found a job, and your life is considered stable, do not slow down. Keep your pace up and go on, enjoy your life. And by enjoy, I mean to do something, not to stop. Oh, and of course, do not get too busy until you forget to find the right person ;)
Love,
Candy
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Installations and Stuff.
These two days, I felt terribly tired. Like, yesterday, 17th August 2012, I went to get my first passport ever. We waited for 2 hours. Finally, I get to go home. (I might be going to Singapore soon, to have fun at the Universal Studio weeee)
That night, I went for the CHS Prefects Annual Dinner. The theme for this year's dinner is "Colours of Summer" which everyone liked because most of us don't have to wear those fancy dresses. Aw yeah. To be honest, I did not enjoy the dinner very much. Like, I can't blend in with my seniors, but still, it's really fun when other juniors joined me in the jacuzzi ;)
Today, well, tiring day. H&G installation. I went and played some games. Those games were gross and disgusting, yet fun. The first game was that the seniors will have to drink four cups of bitter-y beverage while we juniors place our foot into a basin of ice water. MY FOOT ALMOST FROZE. Then, we have this game where we need to break the watermelon using our hands ONLY, and we'll have to finish eating it in time. It's really gross to play games like this on a field, full of grass, you know.
Up next, we'll have to place our face into a basin of water and we'll have to grab a lime (in the water) using our mouth. And then we have our 'newspaper fight duel' and finally, tug-of-war ;)
I also performed "River Flows In You" by Yiruma with other junior ensembles. The installation was amazing though :)
Alright now, listen to this song. My friend, Emily recommended this song to me :)
That night, I went for the CHS Prefects Annual Dinner. The theme for this year's dinner is "Colours of Summer" which everyone liked because most of us don't have to wear those fancy dresses. Aw yeah. To be honest, I did not enjoy the dinner very much. Like, I can't blend in with my seniors, but still, it's really fun when other juniors joined me in the jacuzzi ;)
Today, well, tiring day. H&G installation. I went and played some games. Those games were gross and disgusting, yet fun. The first game was that the seniors will have to drink four cups of bitter-y beverage while we juniors place our foot into a basin of ice water. MY FOOT ALMOST FROZE. Then, we have this game where we need to break the watermelon using our hands ONLY, and we'll have to finish eating it in time. It's really gross to play games like this on a field, full of grass, you know.
Up next, we'll have to place our face into a basin of water and we'll have to grab a lime (in the water) using our mouth. And then we have our 'newspaper fight duel' and finally, tug-of-war ;)
I also performed "River Flows In You" by Yiruma with other junior ensembles. The installation was amazing though :)
Alright now, listen to this song. My friend, Emily recommended this song to me :)
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